Hmmm, I can see you now, shaking your collective heads. She disappears for ages then shows up, right at the end of the year with a picture from Paradise. No, I didn't up and kick the bucket. And, I'm pretty sure if I had I wouldn't have ended in paradise without a lot more work on my journey.
We are in st. John's with our family enjoying a wonderful break from reality of winter, snow, jobs, school and whatever else intrudes on our quest for bliss.
This is the view I have while sitting here typing away. I find myself staring out the door and then reminding myself to blink and breathe. If there is a cellular memory of mine for this view it is soaking it up. I am reminded of the times when I find myself staring into the eyes of a small grandchild and can't see to tear myself away. It's as if someone, an ancestor has taken possession of my eyes and is soaking up the beauty and sweetness of them.
We are having a wonderful time. Of course, it is hard not to have a good time in such a beautiful place. The family is getting along again it isn't so hard to do when you are relaxed. Mary had a week with us and went home yesterday, her job beckons her. The rest of us trundle home in the new year.
I brought a sketchbook thinking that I would be sketching ideas for the new year, drawing what I saw around me, etc.
Instead I have been filling it with quotes from the books that I have been reading about an ex-lama, ex-policeman turned P.I. Most of the quotes are from Buddha or what people believed Buddha would have said, 400 years after he was around and when they first started to record his words.
Even if they were making a lot of it up they had the right idea and it was worthy enough for me to write it down to reflect on again.
I've spent the past couple of months going through my inventory of "stuff". I've felt this strong urge to purge and remove a lot of things that I felt I had to hang on to and store for some obscure reason. I have so many old beliefs in my head that are attached to reasoning that doesn't apply anymore. "Save this for so and so to use when they set up their own home." Yeah, right, like my kids want or need anything old that I have stored. They are of the generation of new and improved or their technology is more advanced than the old model I might have on the shelf.
I picked up a current best seller at B & N the other day. It was written by a lovely Japanese lady on how to "tidy" your belongings. That word, in itself, sent up red flags for me. Tidy and PURGE don't really mean the same thing. She talked about tidying a "four mat home". And, that my friend is when we parted ways. I can tell that the two different cultures view "stuff" in a different manner. I returned the book.
I went back to my box system, one for charity, one to toss in garbage, one to decide if it was really worthy of remaining in my life and one to store. And, by store I mean in a place where I see it and use it and love it or out it goes.
The new year approaches and with it the long tradition of reflecting on the past year, thoughts on where to aim for the new year and thanks for many things.
:) Bea, basking in the tropical sun of St. John, leaves you with this thought;
People are illogical, unreasonable
LOVE THEM ANYWAY
If you do good, people will accuse you
of selfish ulterior motives.
DO GOOD ANYWAY
If you are successful, you will win false
friends and true enemies.
Kent M. Keith