Tuesday, December 09, 2008

Get a grip, woman!

I am sorting fabric in the studio. I have decided the easiest way to do this is to simply run my fingers down a stack and pull out any fabric that looks interesting, as if I was in a fabric store and looking at fabric.
This method seems to be working. I've managed to put together a pile of fabric that I don't particularly care for, probably won't use in the near future and can safely donate to charity.
You don't know how hard this usually is for me. I think I'm probably a fabric slut. I love it all. I love color. I love my black and whites. I love beige.
If anything came to mind when I was sorting through the discarded fabric, any way I might use it, I pulled it out and threw it on the keep pile.
Lucky for me, this time around I haven't been doing that as much.
I seem to have "woken" up lately to a reality of who I am. It surprises me when I can see something in such clarity. I'm 60 years old for goodness sake. You would think I would know myself by now.
I realized the other day that I really don't like chocolate in bread products.
I like it in bakery products but not in bread. I know, not a big insight but still it surprised me when I actually had that thought.
I looked at my pile of discarded fabric and most of it is calico's. I used to love it but not anymore.
I realized that I haven't made a quilt using a pattern in quite a long time. I may use a traditional block but I will end up putting the quilt together in my own fashion.
So, there isn't any reason for me to keep buying patterns. I don't use them.
There isn't any reason for me to keep buying quilt books with patterns. I may like to see them, like I enjoy going to a quilt show but I'm not going to make them.
This might not seem like a big breakthrough to some of you but to me it is.
I've been holding on to a lot of STUFF that just isn't me, anymore. Maybe I needed a mourning period, a time to adjust to the fact that I wasn't that person anymore. Whatever the reason it's really quite freeing.
It reminds me of the time when I realized that I was ready to move from our old beloved home. I could let go of it without feeling any sorrow. I can drive by it without having any emotion what so ever about it. I still like to see it and I'm glad the people that bought it still live there and are happy, but that's about it.
I hope somebody enjoys this fabric. I know the kitchen ware that I took out of my cabinets last week and gave to my daughter to keep or give to her friends has resulted in two phone calls from them, thanking me. I even had a phone call from her boyfriend who told me that some people might think him a geek for loving kitchen stuff but he does and he was so happy to have new pots and pans to use for his cooking.
That ripple effect always, always amazes me.
So, this afternoon, I will sift through my books and see which ones I will pile up to donate to my local library.
Thanks for stopping by and I hope you have a wonderful day!

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous9:32 AM